When my first daughter was born 17 (almost 18) years ago, I imagined that she would be bald (like me) fair-skinned (like me) and loud and demanding (Ok, again, like me). I guess I should have accounted for the fact that half her chromosomes belonged to my darling husband, but still, I was completely shocked when a dark-skinned, black-haired (I couldn’t even see her scalp!) baby entered this world. I was surprised, I was in awe, and I was in love with this little creature who was nothing like I thought she would be. And, in that moment, I learned that she was her own person. On day one, I understood that it was my job to love her and nurture her and help her grow into herself, to help her figure out what makes her tick, and then help her become successful doing that. I needed to support who she would become.
But, it really isn’t that simple….
I’m a parent to four, very different, kiddos. Each has a different hair color, a different body build, a different demeanor, a different personality, and different interests. Seriously, sometimes people don’t believe they all came from the same gene pool (they did!). Three of them have followed their parents lead, willingly participating in sports, studies, chores, routines…etc. They listen without talking back (too much), and tell us EVERYTHING happening in their lives. One of them doesn’t tick that way. One of them pushes a little more, challenges a little more, asks more questions and wants more answers. One of them takes a stand that’s different from the rest. That one is a little more work, a little less “easy”, but very passionate. I like the fight that kiddo has. I know that one will be successful; and I also know that that success might be measured by a completely different stick than the one I would use.
And, isn’t that wonderful?
We each view the world through our own set of eyes. Some of us see fun, adventure, challenge, success, all things good. Other’s see fear, judgment, insecurity, failure, all things unsure. And, as parents, we have to nurture each of our children in a way that will help them view the world more comfortably for them…even if they never see things the way we see them.
Margaret
Monday, June 20, 2011
Friday, June 10, 2011
Sum-Sum-Summertime?
Ahhh, summertime! Those special days that begin as soon as school ends and lasts until it begins again. Days made for sleeping in, chilling out, and hanging at the pool. Perfect for jamming to music, watching movies, and soaking up the sun. Relaxation! Summer was my break from the world, a few great weeks when I didn’t have to stress about homework, clicks, or deadlines. It was great!
Well my friends, summertime has changed. The whole first week of summer this year, my 11 year old, Max, was in the gym earlier than he had been for school the previous year. And while Max dribbled and passed the basketball at basektball camp, my 15 year old, Jack, passed and kicked the football at football camp. My 13 year old, Madeline, started a half hour before her brothers with MAYB basketball practice at 7:30am, and then headed to her school team’s camp at 9:00am…seriously! And we’re just getting started! We have weights and conditioning at 7:00am four days a week starting this week and lasting through the middle of July, and volleyball camp and dance camp and...etc.
And I understand it. I know that Coaches are trying to build programs, trying to see what kids are interested and who will put forth the extra effort to attend. It’s important to build team unity and to begin to teach team concepts and plays as early as possible. And those coaches want to keep up with each other, each wanting high attendance and commitment to “their” sport. I also know that some kids are trying out new sports and activities and parents are looking for ways to keep their kids busy…yada yada yada…it’s just gotten to be too much!
Between camps and practices and games and jobs, kids don’t get to enjoy summers like they used to. And I think kids, especially these days, need time away from sports and activities for a few weeks to rest and recharge their bodies. It would be perfect if coaches all agreed to schedule NOTHING for at least three weeks after school ends to give all of us a break and a chance to actually enjoy a little bit of summer.
Margaret
Well my friends, summertime has changed. The whole first week of summer this year, my 11 year old, Max, was in the gym earlier than he had been for school the previous year. And while Max dribbled and passed the basketball at basektball camp, my 15 year old, Jack, passed and kicked the football at football camp. My 13 year old, Madeline, started a half hour before her brothers with MAYB basketball practice at 7:30am, and then headed to her school team’s camp at 9:00am…seriously! And we’re just getting started! We have weights and conditioning at 7:00am four days a week starting this week and lasting through the middle of July, and volleyball camp and dance camp and...etc.
And I understand it. I know that Coaches are trying to build programs, trying to see what kids are interested and who will put forth the extra effort to attend. It’s important to build team unity and to begin to teach team concepts and plays as early as possible. And those coaches want to keep up with each other, each wanting high attendance and commitment to “their” sport. I also know that some kids are trying out new sports and activities and parents are looking for ways to keep their kids busy…yada yada yada…it’s just gotten to be too much!
Between camps and practices and games and jobs, kids don’t get to enjoy summers like they used to. And I think kids, especially these days, need time away from sports and activities for a few weeks to rest and recharge their bodies. It would be perfect if coaches all agreed to schedule NOTHING for at least three weeks after school ends to give all of us a break and a chance to actually enjoy a little bit of summer.
Margaret
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